#'its as well for you that you didnt kill him otherwise id have killed you bitch'

[gaytobymeres]

anyway holmes is gay and in love with watson

[wawawawawawawawawawawawawa]

out of interest, how do you think izaya developed aspd and npd? i know that pds typically develop as a result of trauma so i suppose his parents always being absent would be a factor but id also like to hear your thoughts on it. love the aspd izaya headcanon btw

first off, thank u!

and secondly, his parents being absent would definetley be a factor. i read somewhere that its actually children whove been neglected that are more likely to develop aspd rather than children who are abused, because the complete LACK of stimului contributes to aspd more than bad stimuli does. take this with a grain of salt though because my source is "i saw it somewhere" and im 90% sure that place was NOT a study so it might be wrong

but either way, both pds are known to be caused by trauma and both have a genetic component to them. the genetic component isnt SUPER well known, but it IS known that there's a hereditery component here

so honestly? i think izaya was born with antisocial tendencies. NOT aspd, i must stress- at a very young age, if he was given adequate support and treatment, they could've stayed tendeicies and he wouldn't have developed fullblown aspd. he couldve turned out like one of those guys with a bit of a skewed morality system but is otherwise mentally healthy enough to participate in society without wanting to kill himself or others. quirks over disorder

but from pretty much every account i can think of, izaya was ALWAYS an odd child, to the point where it was his father that instilled a love of humanity into him

When he was younger, I saw he was distant from others, and that made me worried. And so I wanted him to come to like humans and become a man who could strongly love people twice as others would. (source)

of course this isnt exactly very detailed wrt izayas behavior, but if its enough that his absent father noticed, it mustve been pretty serious

so wrt his aspd, i think he was born with those kinds of tendencies, which were then exasperated by the neglect and ergo got worse and worse over the years, culminating in high school with his friendship with shinra, blackmailimg of nakura, and his beginning to poke his nose in the underground

his npd is a bit trickier

so, the way i personally developed npd is that my mom would seem to have two perceptions of me in her head, depending on wether or not i was following the Good Perception or not. the first me, the good one, was intelligent, kind, and filled with potential. the other one was a stupid lazy monster. i was the good one, up until i did anything she didnt like, then i was the bad one. these two ideas getting fed into me led to me clinging onto the Good Perception as how i really was, and if something even for a second made me slip, i'd crash down from total egoism to total repulsion. And It Sucked!

(disclaimer: do not armchair diagnose my mother. i have my theories but they will stay private and i absolutely do not want a STRANGER butting into this, especially when they could know less abt mental illness than me and thus spread misinformation)

now, i dont think izaya's parents were like my mom- but there was still a dichotomy at play here. he would go to school, where he would be a smart student and praised by his teachers, even if he kept to himself. then, he'd go home, and be alone. as he got older, it only got worse- humans are social creatures, and we don't take well to being lonely. the mind starts to cope with it however it can.

as izaya started to venture deeper into the underground, he couldve started to develop a superiority complex about it. see, look- he's smarter than everyone. better than everyone. that's why he's alone, its because he's too good to be around them. not because he's worse. he's better.

because, especially once he gets to high school age... izaya is smart. izaya is perceptive. izaya would be able to tell that there's something different about him, and that's why people avoid him and he avoids them. there's something wrong with him in a way that's repulsive and unpalatable to most. that'd wreck a kid's self-image, especially a neglected kid's, since he'd already have low self-image from, yk, the neglect

and the dichitomy of the low and high self-image makes him develop npd- the ego masks the low self esteem, but both are equally felt and true, its not like his egoism and god complex are fake- it's all very real, he feels it all and believes it genuinely, and he clings onto it because if he slips, he KNOWS where he's gonna plummet

anyway thats just my take on it!! "it was his childhood" is prolly a boring answer but honestly a lot of mental illness has that answer at the root of it. art imitates life and all

[thedawningofthehour]

Its always a joy to see an update from your fic and I do hope this one treats you better than the last and that youre well!

I havent quite read through the latest chapter yet, but I remembered a question Id forgotten to send. Some time ago you answered a different ask I believe wanting to know what would happen if Leo were to ask Draxum to join them. I think you said Draxum would have refused him, but obviously he didnt do that with Raph and so Im wondering, what was different? Would he have still refused Leo had he beaten Raph to the punch or would Draxum have accepted Leo in this time since they had the collars at the ready?

Hope you have a great rest of your day!

Thank you! In general readership went way down when I moved from Book 1 to 2, but it worked itself back up. Not to the point doth was at in the last few chapters, but better. It's plummeted again, but I'm hoping it'll pick back up like it did for Book 2. (otherwise, I'm not really sure what's happening, other than people getting fatigued? Did a bunch of people stop reading because of Raph doing his stupid thing?)

Clarification: Draxum would have initially refused him. Leo would have had to sell himself, and really make a good case for it because Draxum would have been very resistant to the idea. But that's the sort of thing Leo really excels at. So I don't think it's out of the question that he'd succeed. He'd just really have to nail it in one go.

I mean, a couple reasons. A major one being that Draxum really doesn't like Leo. Leo is overwhelmingly the one poking the sword in Draxum's side, he's loud and disobedient and Draxum thinks he doesn't take anything seriously. He's come to realize what a mastermind strategist Leo is, but honestly that just makes him hate him more because Leo is usually strategizing against him. He hates how fanatically devoted he is to bringing his twin back, he hates that he can't just kill Leo or beat him to a pulp. And he hates that on some level, he still thinks to himself "in another life he'd be my son."

But the main factor in all this is the way Draxum views Raph. Draxum glorifying Raph's size and strength is a huge theme here and it goes back to the table chapters. Raph was the only other turtle he seriously considered taking besides Donnie, and even though he ultimately decided against it due to the difficulties of holding him, it always bothered him that he still technically didn't get everything he wanted. Logically, he knows that Raph's fighting prowess could be replicated-Tigerclaw isn't one of his mutants, but he's proof that Draxum could easily obtain other powerful mutants that came willingly to his cause and were far more loyal.

The problem being that Draxum, as much as he pretends he's not, is very sentimental. He planned to raise the turtles themselves, both as warriors and people, and especially now with how close he's grown to Galois he thinks more and more about what life could have been had Lou Jitsu not kidnapped them. It wasn't just having a super elite warrior at his beck and call, it was the thought of having this massive, extremely powerful mutant warrior and being able to call him his. He considers both Donatello and Raphael to have been his masterwork-and he can't even take full credit for Donnie because it wasn't his intention to make him a genius. It drove him crazy not to have his masterpiece by his side, and even if he can't admit to creating Raph now he still knows Raphael was his work. He feels very smug about that.

Another thing is going back to the risk vs rewards thing. The reason Draxum didn't kidnap Raph along with Donnie was because he'd be physically impossible to control, but with Raph submitting willingly (and having a shock collar that could paralyze him on command) that was much less of a concern. But Raph, as strong and powerful as he is, is also...not very bright. Like, he absolutely has good problem-solving skills, and while he's not on Leo or Mikey's level he is emotionally intelligent. But there's no way he could outsmart Draxum, and he's also aware of his own limits enough to know not to try. A shock collar and the threat of instant death is enough to subdue him.

It would not be enough for Leo. Even if Draxum didn't think Leo could outsmart him outright, he'd still try. His attempts could be destructive, and he'd likely be forced to hurt or even kill Leo in retaliation. Which he wouldn't consider a breach of his promise to Donatello, since Leo would have initiated the entire thing and agreed upon those conditions, but agreeing to Leo's proposal knowing it would most likely end with Draxum killing him wasn't really in the spirit of the promise. And again, part of him still doesn't want to kill Leo. Part of him still understands that he's his son's brother, and they both love the same person even if they're calling him by different names.

Also Raph's proposal addressed a major insecurity of Draxum's, that being the subject of Galois's safety. He's freaked out. He knows he has to let Gale out of the house at some point, but he's terrified of what might happen when he does. 'Giant murder turtle bodyguard' might not solve the problem, but it makes it a whole lot better, and it's done in a way that doesn't make Draxum look like a crazy overprotective father. He might worry about Raph messing with Gale's head, but he knows Raph is still extremely protective of him and would die before he let Gale get hurt. Leo-what could Leo do for him? He wasn't big and intimidating, had already proven that he couldn't protect Galois properly-he's still injured from that event, at this point Draxum would have every reason to believe Leo's lack of mobility is permanent. It just wouldn't be worth the risk.

In short: Draxum knew he really shouldn't take any turtle up on that offer. It was a stupid decision, and it went against what he promised Donatello. But Raph did the equivalent of dangling a piece of meat in front of him and Draxum was practically salivating the second Raph knelt before him.

[halalchampagnesocialist]

knocks on your door hey do you have uhm. ok this will sound stupid and rude but i promise i have a reason dyhave sources on how isreal treated palenstines before hamas? my brother “looked a bit into the history of isreal” and now thinks “isreal is based” and thinks that the bombings are because the hamas are under civilian structures so “theres nothing they can do” and such and such. he amends that theres been a lot of civilian casualties but otherwise he supports isreal and i really dont believe what hes saying? he says that the whole sympathy for gaza is also part of hamas strategy and like. i dont know much about it but people r dying man. also the fact that olive trees are being burned down as well as the sniper killing a local hero in the resistance just kinda reeks of ‘this isnt about hamas’. so. yeag id like to send him stuff. sorry in general and you obviously dont have to do this but even if i didnt send it to him id still like to learn more in general

hey! no that's okay, always happy to provide sources!! seeing as hamas was formed and is based in gaza, i'm focusing on that.

obviously a key event was the 1948 expulsion of palestinians, many palestinians fled into the current gaza strip and still live there as refugees.

another key event was the 1956 massacres in rafah and khan younis - which mind you occured before israel militarily occupied the palestinian territories in '67.

and then of course, the 1967 occupation by israel. there's been many things that occurred between '67 and 2006 when hamas was actually elected. my knowledge of gaza isn't as sharp but for instance, there was the infamous killing of mohammed al-durrah by israeli forces during the second intifada in 2000.

unfortunately, israel has only used hamas' presence in power in gaza as a way or justification rather to further escalate its attacks on gaza, seeing as gaza has faced five 'wars' now with this one being the worst. it implemented the blockade right after hamas got elected which led to a deteriorating humanitarian situation.

as for the west bank, i could list off many things, and the list is endless. it should be noted that hamas has never been in power in the west bank, and in my opinion, the situation in the west bank is also terrible. the palestinian authority is in power in the west bank but that does not stop israelis from constantly violating what little sovereignty palestinians have (if any). it does not stop them from constantly conducting raids and incursions into towns and villages and arresting palestinians in the dead of the night. nevermind the settler violence that is actively committed as israeli soldiers just stand by and watch. again, i could go on.

[unlimitedhorsepower]

Tagged by: @thevoiceofthanatos​

Favorite color: warm bright yellow, mustard yellow & old gold, and just yellow in general. its a good colour. it makes me happy

Currently reading: idk, probably star trek fanfic my friend @rubbertplant​ was writing to give my opinion on it. i often read through my own stuff too lol, like whoah i wrote that??? ADHD has taken everything from me including my capability to read though, for real. ive been thinking of trying to listen to some audiobooks recently though, this cannot continue... its just that i also have no ears disease so idk how well that would go. determined to try though

Last song you listened to: havent been listening to music so much bc ive been playing videos instead but my last.fm has all my spotify listens so itll stay up to date on whatever i listened to last. currently seems to be “please play-bite” by pinocchioP. i often just let spotify play me whatever it recommends anyhow so theres variance. and i only started this account like a few months ago max so its not really a full picture of my music-listening

Last movie (in theaters): its not really a movie, but if it counts, the first ginga nagareboshi gin stageplay (recorded and released in finland in theaters with subs)

ginga was always huge in finland for some reason. idk. the anime is so violent though that i got really afraid of bears for some reason. theres so much blood... i never read the manga either i just knew of the anime and partook in my share of wolf roleplays (dogs were uncool! so i didnt do dog roleplays. iirc that really was my reason).

heres some funny wolves from my wolf rp days

2010. one of the first things i coloured digitally... i painstakingly cleaned the scanned pencil lineart with a mouse

2011. i had gotten my first drawing tablet as a birthday/xmas gift and practiced a ton around this time (more than just wolves lol)

Last series I watched: trigun stampede. even changed my phone bg into vash... but millions knives is probably my favourite. he just does everything wrong and makes his life worse. and everyone elses life too bc he sucks. but hes multifaceted so hes also my meow meow and whatever. i hope a ford explorer drives over him

if it counts though, ive seen some star trek TOS episodes and movies because my friends have been watching them. im not super into it but its always fun to hang. i also dont watch a lot of stuff. i dont even know what i do. guy who doesnt read or watch things but listens to jerma videos on youtube without actually looking at them while i “draw” and “write”

Craving: food honestly. i should cook something lmfao. i also want soda so bad but i dont have any. id make some tea but its disgustingly warm in my house so i only want cool drinks. could kill for a nice milkshake or a smoothie rn i think

Tea or coffee: tea... im the only finnish person who doesnt drink coffee for real. also got really into loose leaf tea bc i befriended a chinese lady who is really into tea and has a tea shop in the city near where i live

Currently working on: drawing this and trying to think how i want to do it. somehow want to incorporate flat colours and maybe shade his body naturally, and make the blood look realistic instead of flat colours... hmm not sure yet what i want to do

other than that im trying to proofread the chapter of my ryanyuri fanfic i already published because theres a lot of typos and strange sentences in there but its been a chore bc my body breaks down when it gets too warm smfh... not looking forward to when my apt goes over 30 degrees celsius it is unlivable. im also trying to complete a “lookbook” of my tnb sims. but i always start huge projects that take three million years to complete and im really slow lmfao

Tag people you’d like to get to know better: i could just ask these questions from everyone i talk on discord with. fuck my friends i know irl or otherwise, only asking people who r my friends through tumblr. no need to do this though. also this isnt probably meant to be answered so long-windedly... thats just me. i cant answer with one word i gotta write an essay. heres three tags though @basslinegrave​ @vita-divata​

(record scratch before 3rd tag) and @rubbertplant​ bc they were streaming a game in discord when i started typing this and i was like hey wanna do it and they were like yeah

i expect replies on my desk by 5pm TOMORROW!!!!get to work!!!! no i jest, do it or dont, i dont mind either way, just if you feel like doing this. if you see this and want to do it feel free to consider yourself tagged. godspeed

[mikeyfuckinway]

auuuhhg everyday of my life im like this guy and i are so incompatible. it would never work if we were to date and tbh i do not want to date him traditionally however i am deeply charmed by him and think hes one of the funniest loveliest and most interesting people on this planet earth i WANTED to listen to him talk about the beatles for an hour over lunch and he made me a beatles playlist after i made him a they might be giants playlist and hes so wonderful and i want him to be like. my best friend forever like i want him to be my guy like hes not my bestest estest friend someone else occupies that position and they always will its like that thing where u know someone for so long and your relationship has gone through so many weird phases that nothing is ever going to make you not want to be friends with them anymore like theyre my ultimate person who i will know and love forever. but like i want this other guy to be one of MY guys and. you know what i dont think i have a crush on him anymore. my friends and i were talking about love languages and i am severely physically affectionate and he is a germophobe he has ocd but like thats one of the things i like abt him bc he has things like i do like ticks and habits and we both habitually chew our nails and we are so similar but at the same time we are both so different and hes also really really straight and cis so like i dont think itd ever truly work but anyways we were talking abt love languages and hes like a big quality time guy and im very like i wanna do my things like i love you but if youre doing something im uninterested in i dont want to do it. like i have done things that i wouldnt otherwise do bc he was doing them but like it wasnt a "i dont want to do this" to a "i want to do this bc hes going to be there" it was more of a "im indifferent to this but it sounds fun im just not specifically interested" to a "i specifically would like to do this now bc it sounds fun and also he is going to be there" idk its still a thing where like. im just not a specifically quality time kind of person but since im a physical affection kind of person it can kind of come with it but i dunno oh well oh well. either way i dont think we would fulfill what the other wants out of a relationship idk maybe i would for him mostly but i dont think he would for me. unless our understanding of each other changes dramatically and he spends like a month and a half reading queer theory. then like maybe but still. my biggest problem is i need someone who will understand me and understand why i am the way i am genderwise and the thing is. the people who fully understand the way i am will also probably identify like me bc my identity is a product of my understanding of gender and society and that shit, not the other way around. i identify the way i do mostly bc of how my ideas about that shit have changed and the reading ive done about it. and like also the autism but he kind of has that too like not totally the same but like i said we have like some of the same little things but when it comes to like our ideas of ourselves i think we are very different i also have severely pathologized myself from a young age and also i hated my mom and wanted to kill myself and as far as im aware he was much more well adjusted as a child but i guess i dont really know. hm. but i met his parents when they came for family weekend and also he was like surprised when i said my family doesnt eat dinner together very often so they seem pretty like normal midwest american family and didnt seem like they had many familial issues like my household did which honestly is the least big deal thing to me. like if it was just that id be like whatever that doesnt matter but in addition to all the stuff yknow thats just one more thing that is like very extremely different about us and how we developed as people. like honestly its mostly the queer thing. and the germophobe thing like when we were talking abt it like he did say he would probably be very bad at it in a relationship like i oh wow i hit the character limit

[spasiannrd]

while my mental is getting better... i just had a pretty big breakdown.

this a long and sappy post. if you choose to read it, thanks for caring even in the slightest. otherwise, please continue on enjoying this lovely and chaotic place. 💜

i havent really had anyone outside my family and therapist to confide in these past few years. so its hard to confide in anything now. dont get me wrong, talking to a few of you about the struggles help and it means the world to me that someone out there cares. you know who you are and just know while i dont respond, i am grateful. it is hard though because i really am someone who needs physical love to feel comfort. hugging, hand holding, wiping the tears off eachothers cheeks when they fall. you know the small silent things you share and do to express your care and love for someone. ive yearning that so much as of late and it kills me that ive pushed away so many people that could be that for me right now. besides my family and a few close friends no one knows that my grandfather just passed and i havent been able to come up with the words to talk about how ive been feeling until now. (just as a side note we really need to stop fucking normalizing boys/men bottling up their emotions... this is a whole other rant i can go on but back to it.) i just came down from weeping and feeling so horrible for not being enough of a person for him. but i realize that its not the full truth. sure i have regrets but ive done so much good and try to do so much good. thanks to years of therapy and help from medications, i can understand these emotions better, while im not fully there; its good. i just wish i had the understanding i have now sooner. so i couldve been more present when my grandfather was alive and well. i wish that i couldve had the chance to listen to all his stories about his past instead of hearing about it post-mortem. this man was the nicest and most patient man you couldve ever met and i really dont know where id be without him. he was the father figure i didnt know i needed when my own father didnt know how to stay. he had so much patience when i spent most of my childhood idealizing a man who didnt know how to love his son. im so grateful that he rose my mother to be the best mother a son couldve ever asked for. i cherish the knowledge and the wisdom he bestowed upon me. i am so grateful that in the past two years i spent as much time with him as i could. with every chance i got i made a point to give him a hug goodbye and make sure i waved before walking out of sight when leaving. im glad that the beautiful traits he had are in me and i can carry on his gentle nature. i will forever miss him and wish he was still with us so he could finish the things he had planned. but life is not fair and we cannot prepare for the end all the time. so i just hope that in his final weeks, days, and moments we made him feel loved. i hope that wherever he is now that he is at peace. i love you grandpa and thank you for everything.

[roleplayingwithartscape]

Highblood

Your troops readied their weapons as the door opened, from the darkness red dots landed on his violet jacket, some reflecting from the goggles on his neck. He easily towered over most of your rebels, no doubt they were terrified of the troll.

"Finally. Kept us waiting long enough!" You flash a grin as he is forced to take a seat, giving looking around the room and trying to analyze the situation  "I doubt you expected anything less when you asked for an audiance Violet." He is forced to grin and wave it off "Haha, of course. Ive heard of your... fame, to say the least." "Good, good. Your messages to be believed, you are after a fucking redblood. Really a shame someone your caste couldnt fucking do shit on his own." He smiles and nods along, looking down at you with a condescending glare, like letting a grub finish off his rambling.

"And here I was assuming you are of notable talent, someone that could be of use. I'm shocked to see your admission otherwise, but thank you, for not wasting my time." He keeps up his arrogant smile as he moves to get up. To your suprise certainly, prompting a growl from you, "sit back." One of your men shoot the door frame.

He does as he's told as you recalculate your plans. If he's so comfortable with ending the meeting, he must have another lead. Perhaps Soulfire's gang could also supply him with Crisom's whereabouts...but you doubt he would come to you first, even if what you have heard of him was accurate. "Explain what you're here to beg for." You already know, "First off, a proper greeting is in order. Sparon Tarton, Storming Saviour, full time vigilante. And youre Verald Fawxul. Leader of the emeralds. One of the local rebels, Crisom, had picked up my attention. You know where he is."  You squint, "I might."

"Its beneficial for both of us if you did. You find him to be a power hungry nuisance, distracting your efforts of... whatever it is you do," his smile dims down, "I find him to be a scum I wish to rip the spine out of and watch him die in a puddle of his own blood. You give me his whereabouts, and I scorch his rebels under brilliant lightning." His voice echoes in the room, contrasting with his friendly entrance, enhanced by his larger stature. Good. You didnt want to bother with his fake smiles.

Yet, you let out a sigh. "Cant do that. If I could, Id already put his head on a wall," "Unfortunate." "He has multiple bases. Rebel standart. Most I can give is a list, but I cant storm each of em. I dont have the cannon fodder to do so with ease."

"Cannon fodder?" "These guys." You gesture around the room, grinning ear to ear, witha hint of joy in your voice, "dont act shocked Violet, we both know how things work here. Just cause Im not one of you, doesnt mean I'll hesitate to send them to their death if it meant Id finish that bastard off." He squints at you. Its. Hard to read his expression, how much of it is leftover from his talk about Crisom, and how much is getting upset seeing he doesnt have a leg up against you. "You remind me of a friend. Im sure you'd hate eachother." Oh joy. You almost want to drag this on to get more of this so called captain's troubled expression.

But you have matters to attend, "You perhaps could help with man power." He lets out a thoughtful hum, "of course. My friend and I can clean one of the bases Im sure. But you are not to kill him yourself. The fuchsia wants the honor." "Heh, thats an easy deal. I just want him gone. Dont care who does it." "Good."

He moves to leave, you halt him before he makes his exit, "Im sure your alliance will be a great asset. Thanks for the visit." You flash the same shit eating grin. You says nothing, merely glaring you down, before closing the door. You can almost hear lightning buzzing in the air.

"Well boys, another great one wasnt it? Drinks on me."

[jegulily-stuff]

Okay, ritual magic headcanons:

the basics: a ritual can involve ingredients like a potion, ceremonial words or actions, may need to be done at a particular time (of day or year) or in a particular place, and often requires more than one person to complete

i apply this to the reincarnation ceremony thing in GoF. you can cover up the plot contrivance of voldemort waiting the whole year to get harry/ his blood if that ritual requires a specific celestial alignment and harrys physical presence. i also think it's cool if the extra things peter says about the ingredients ('willingly sacrificed' for his hand, 'forcibly taken' for the blood etc) are actively necessary for the whole thing to work.

you can also think of lilys protective magic as ritually created, albeit accidentally. the ritual elements being voldemort offering out loud to spare her in exchange for harry and her out loud refusing (without fighting back) and then him killing her, so both formal verbal statements and a sacrifice. maybe someone born into a pureblood household would have known better than to make the offer then kill her anyway and voldemort just didnt or maybe its not well known.

in a way all contract magic has ritual elements. like putting your name in the goblet of fire. i prefer to think that harry only became bound by the tournaments contract when he accepted the slip with his name on since otherwise its possible to enter someone else in a binding contract (lethally binding?) without their consent or even presence and thats too overpowered and never used elsewhere

ritual magic has the potential to be more powerful than a regularly cast spell especially if it involves a lot of people. I'd headcanon that the taboo on voldemorts name is created this way and that it requires a lot of people, since a taboo is usually a society wide institution in real life, so all the death eaters participate (explaining why voldemort doesnt put a taboo on 'horcrux' so he knows whos saying it, since he would have to tell other people the word)

rituals can involve blood sacrifice, like the reincarnation ritual does. and blood rituals would be considered dark magic because they require harm to someone, even if that person is a willing practitioner

it can have a religious element, with say community centred rituals at different times of the year like yule or mayday or the summer solstice, but with function like a widespread prosperity or protection charm

because of the non christian religious element the practice came into conflict with christianity pre segregation. there was an internal push within the magical community to stop the practice to appease muggles who were violently anti magic. this wasnt that popular, but when the ministry was formed they codified it as a progressive change, maybe as part of segregation and hiding themselves from muggles

this puts old families who keep the practice at odds with the ministry and progressives which i think is interesting. the ministry is always more progressive than those families even though they have a lot of influence. it can add to the resentment about having to change to appease muggles which id imagine thered be a lot of since their whole society went into hiding. so much of ministry policy is related to muggles, the magical world really does live under that shadow.

a general note. magical culture in the story is pretty derivative of muggle culture and a christian culture even though the characters aren't practicing christians. like the magical christmas songs that are just muggle christmas songs with a couple of magical words chucked in. this is lazy writing but im trying to make it into something more narratively fulfilling. therefore: theres internal conflict between people who want to preserve 'magical culture' consisting of mostly pre christian pagan traditions and people who want to leave those 'archaic' practices in the past and dont feel connected to them/ associate them with anti-muggle sentiment. the idea that the magical world has been absorbing the surrounding majority culture of their country, even while almost completely segregated, to the point that their prevailing culture is this shallow imitation of it - i think it's really cool to let it play out realistically. wizards who still view muggles as barbaric and christianity as a threat to their survival would be super pissed off that their own culture is being passively replaced by the culture of this external enemy group. having that be a grievance during and leading up to the war gives more depth to the political situation.

in the end its a performance debate. progressives see it as a type of dark magic and if a person wants it unbanned theyre aligning themselves against social progress and against peace with muggles. and the people who support it generally do hold those beliefs, but you wouldnt have to since none of thats inherrent in the magic itself, its just ended up with a lot of heavy social connotations.

id have a discussion between regulus and lily about it eventually add nuances like, historically some wizards were/are christian and most pagans werent wizards (muggles could and did practice witchcraft as a spirituality, you might not even know in some communities who had magic and who didnt) and the hard cultural divide is an invented idea. and the fact that you can balance keeping up your culture and social progress. trying to conquer muggles is not the right way to get your cultural autonomy back - its in no way necessary. also there would be a lot of weight in him inducting her into what has essentially been a closed practice for a dwindling number of people. breaking tradition but actually taking a step to achieve the goal of cultural preservation

*Gets up on a soapbox*

Reg isn't a Potions whizz. You just associate him with Potions because 1) he drank one and died, 2) you associate him with Slughorn, his Head of House, who was a Potions teacher, 3) he becomes a more relevant character in Half-blood Prince which also heavily features Potions.

Lily and Snape are the ones who are brilliant at potions. Regulus shouldn't just be a fanon replacement for Snape because we dont like him, they're distinct characters. Let Snape have his Potions skills and give Reg something that fits him as a character instead of always Potions.

How about Runes? It's got the secret knowledge element that fits his story, tradition and ancient history which must be important to him, and it's stuffy and book-learnt rather than practical and so is he. Or Divination? That's mystical and obscure and you kind of have to be born for it, which is on theme. Or even Transfiguration, but Sirius (and/or James) is still better at it so even though Reg is ungodly good he can never be the best and no one cares he's so good. There are a lot of fitting options.

[cowboisadness]

Found You {Arthur Morgan x F!reader}

Summery: She was there for Arthur through everything, being more than good friends but less than partners. They support eachother through the good and bad times, it’s not love tho, no, it’s not love at all.

Rating: M. Basically porn with plot. More plot than i planned i really got carried away with this. SMUT IS HERE! 18+ ONLY!!

—–

Chapter 4 - Together

The next few days were nothing short of torture. Arthur never spoke another word to me, huffing whenever I would say something to him or just walking away from me completely. Everyone else in camp soon noticed something serious had happened between us. Their comforting words and questions on what happened went unanswered and dismissed. I hoped time would help, that I would get a chance to explain myself and apologise for my foolishness and downright stupidity. But as the days passed, the frayed ends of the rope had no chance of being reconnected, no matter how hard I tried and how hard I cried. So I flung myself into as many jobs as I could get. As a distraction.

Robbing homesteads. Stagecoaches that turned into shootouts more often than not. Gambling with fellers that were too drunk to notice me stealing their wears from right under their noses and gone before they realised anything was amiss. Fighting in hidden alleyways with meagre men that thought they could take on a woman with nothing to lose. Just to feel something, another kind of pain that would lessen with time.

It wasn’t until I was sat at the edge of the camp, cleaning my revolver while looking out over the overlook, stars raining bright above. Bottle of whiskey by my side that Hosea came over and sat beside me. Silent at first. Taking in the view.

“You going to explain whats going on?”

“Nothings going on, Hosea.” I shrugged, running the oiled cloth over the same spot mindlessly. “Arthur won’t tell me. I though out of the two of you, you would.” he kept his eyes ahead, not bothering to look at me. I sighed, my shoulders dropping in defeat. I might as well tell him, not like he would be able to change my mind.

“I’m an idiot. I spoke to Mary. Told her to leave Arthur alone and to stop contacting him.”

“Why?”

“I don’t know anymore...Seemed like a good idea at the time.”

“You love him.” I could see his grin out of the corner of my eye, albeit a sad on.

“Not you too, Hosea.”

“You two were very close. Closer than you think I realise. I’m not a dumb old man you know”

I didnt reply to that. No point to, my mind was made up now. Instead, I holstered my gun and stood, picking up the bottle as I did. Turning to Hosea to finally look at him.

“I’m leaving, Hosea. Only for a few weeks or a few months. I don’t know.”

“You really think leaving will help?” “Maybe. It might help him if I’m not here. I’ll send money and write to you and Dutch. I’ve already packed.” After a few more words and questions on my plans when I’m out there on my own, we hugged and I said my goodbyes to him, Dutch and a few others. Promising the girls I will see them again, even though I was doubtful. I willed no tears to spill when I gathered my things, leaving my tent bare and hollow. Mounting my horse I left camp without looking back, letting the wind guide me in whatever direction it wanted me to go.

---

Roughly 4 months had passed since leaving. Currently holed up in a now-abandoned cabin in the depths of Grizzlies East by O’Creagh’s run, hiding from the law after robbing the fence in Van Horne. Id wrote letters and sent money to nearby stations as promised. Keeping updated with the gangs coming and goings. The last time I heard from those who would write back, mainly Hosea and Mary-Beth, was when they were held up in a place called Shady Belle. I haven’t heard anything from them since. That was a month ago. I had thought of going there, finding them. But I couldn’t bare having to leave again after realising they had been getting on fine and had left me to my own devices. Coming to the conclusion that I was not returning and that I had abandoned them all. Which was far from the truth. I still cared, which I’m sure was evident from whatever leftover money I had been sending to them. Only, it wasn’t getting picked up from the stations anymore, along with my many letters. I was travelling back to the cabin after an evening hunting for supper and hopeful breakfast. The blanket of trees now behind me, opening up the wondrous starry night, pulling my jacket closed as the cold breeze this time of year began to sting any uncovered skin. I looked around before dismounting, taking my kill of two rabbits stowed on the side of my ever faithful horse and made my way inside. Looking around once more to make sure I hadn’t been followed. Just to be safe. As I began to skin and gut the meat, the warm glow from the lantern lighting my every movement in the otherwise dark cabin, I heard motion outside. Bears and wolves were not uncommon around these parts. I had to shoot my way out of a wolf pack not a week ago, coming away with nothing but a bruise on my hip from being bucked off the horse in her desperate attempt to flee. Nevertheless, I placed down the knife and picked up my rifle propped up against the door. Looking out the window to the right of the door. Seeing nothing and hearing nothing else. I went to the door, preparing my rifle then placing my ear to the door. It was silence for a few moments, then movement again, making its way up the steps. It didn’t sound like an animal. With a hand on the handle and rifle ready to be used, I swung the door open. The rifle now aimed at the unwelcomed guest.

It took a moment for my eyes to adjust in the darkness, but it didnt take long to recognise who it was.

“Arthur?” It was barely a whisper. A question of disbelief. I blinked a few times, surely my eyes were playing tricks on me.

After a few breaths, he finally spoke “I’ve found you.” We just stood there, I released a breath I didnt even know I was holding. How did he find me? Why would he? Months of keeping myself away from people the best I could and staying hidden for long periods of time I was beginning to feel content with being a lone wolf. Not thinking that lone wolves are weakened beings after too long. Often driven out when deemed useless or a weakness to the pack, or leaving to find their own family. Not alone forever, wolves would struggle and go insane.

But he, of all people, found me. The only question now is why. And that was the only thing I could say as I lowered the gun.

“Why?”

He told me everything that happened. The downfall, the betrayal, the heartbreak. Those that we lost. Everyone gone in one way or another. Sean, Kieran, Lenny, Hosea, Molly, Miss Grimshaw. Dead. Saint Denis bank, Guarma, Micah working with the Pinkertons. In the end, Micah had turned Dutch against almost everyone, whispering little worms into his ear until they grew and grew to leave no room for anything else.

Dutch turning his back on Him and John. Leaving John to bleed out and leaving Arthur on that mountain. Where he thought would be his final resting place. But once the sun was up, high in the sky, he found the energy to live. To heal. To find me.

And that’s what he did the last few weeks until he heard whispers of someone fitting my description that caused a bit of hell in Van Horn. He knew he was close.

“But...why did you want to find me?” I asked. Both of us sat around the small table below the window, two empty whiskey glasses before us.

He took in a deep breath, his perfect blue eyes meeting my bloodshot and watery ones. “I wanted to the moment I was told you left,” He leaned over, taking my hands in his.

“I’ve had a lot of time to think these last few months. Especially in the last few weeks. What you did before you left, I understand now why.”

“But I hurt you.” letting a sob escape, my body starting to tremble and I’m sure he could feel it in my hands.

“It did hurt. But losing you hurt even more,” He said, nothing more than a whisper, his eyes never leaving mine and his hold on my hands not faltering as he continued. “I remember what you said to me that night years ago. ‘Bout not knowing how much I mean to you. Well - I - I do. Because I feel the same. Always have. it just took me a while to realise it I guess.”

I couldn’t stop the tears. The damn had busted open. Within seconds he was on me, his arms enveloping me, my hands coming to purchase on his shirt. Neither of us wanted to let go, out of fear the other would disappear into the air like dust in the morning rays. We held each other for what felt like an eternity, my tears slowing and the shaking subsiding. I lifted my head from where it was perched on his chest to look at him, our eyes locked once more. No words were spoken but I could see it in the depths of those pools, the forgiveness and longing. And I was sure my eyes mirrored the same. His hand came up to cradle my face and I instinctively leaned into him, my breathing hitching despite the calmness that washed over me. Then I looked into his eyes again, only to be met with a look I had not seen in many years. I opened my mouth to speak but before I could he surged forward, his lips on mine. It was delicate, more fragile than any other kiss we had shared. It wasn’t long until that fragility turned into desperation, my hands at the nape of his neck, his on my waist. My mind was running a million miles a minute, all thoughts of him and this moment. Feeling like we were young lovers again. His hands roamed my sides as I gripped his hair, keeping each other glued to one another. My body began to burn up, feelings I had repressed for months pushing their way to the surface, refusing to be drowned. We broke apart and he pulled me to stand, his lips now on my neck, trailing wet kisses from below my ear to the hollow of my neck, causing me to moan. He looked at me then, desperation and pleading etched upon his face before I kissed him again. Kissing the scar on his chin that was easily visible within the stubble, his jaw, down to his neck and then his chest. Pushing off his jacket and suspenders with it. My fingers returned to the front of his shirt, undoing the buttons slowly as he pushed me back into the direction of the bed. My legs soon coming into contact with the edge. His hands now making a start on my blouse, pulling it from the confines of my pants and lifting it over my head. My hands roaming his chest and snaking down to his abdomen, stroking the hair there, causing him to tense at my touch. He always was a fine man, built from hard work that I couldn't help but adore. His arms wrapping around to my back to undo the corsets lacing, completely surrounding me and all I could smell was him. Horse, rain, sweat and something that was just so undoubtedly him. Undoing his gun belt was muscle memory, hitting the floor with a thud, my corset following, now both bare from the waist up. We couldn’t wait any longer, our lips on each other once again as we worked on unbuttoning our pants. He leaned me down to lay on the bed, my legs hanging over the sides as he wasted no time to pull off the rest of my clothing. Laying there propped up on my elbows I watched as he raked his eyes over every curve, scar and freckle on my body. Kneeling between my legs he drew kisses from my knee up my thigh, getting oh so close to where I wanted him to be. He looked up at me once more, giving a shuddering breath before his mouth landed between my legs, soft but purposeful strokes easily pulling moans from me. He didn’t let up, devouring me like a man starved as he paid close attention to my little bundle of nerves. My body shaking again but for a whole different reason. It had been too long and I knew I wasn’t going to last if he kept going for a minute longer. My hands fisting the bedsheets I tried to speak but it was useless, squirming from the sensations. Lifting my legs to rest on his shoulders feeling him moan against me, the vibration causing bolts of electricity to fire through my whole body and land at my core. I could feel my orgasm rapidly approaching and my hand flew down to card through his hair, holding him there. My body convulsed as I tipped off the edge, my head rolling back as the blinding pleasure washed over me, moaning his name into the air. Arthur was above kissing me within seconds, tasting myself on his tongue and lips. Catching my breath he pushed me further up the bed until my head hit the plush pillows. Removing his pants and then situating himself between my legs. I could feel him pressed up against my thigh, hot and swollen and begging for attention. And oh how my body craved to give him what he needed. His eyes met mine, hooded and filled with lust. Silently asking for permission. I nodded, placing a kiss on his forehead and placing my hands on his shoulders. Electrifying jolts surged through my core as he strokes himself along my slit tenderly. His skin burning to my touch and looking downright drunk. Completely intoxicated. He sinks into me slowly. My body soon getting accustomed to the memory of him as he bottoms out, his hips meeting my thighs. My breath hitches as he bites back a moan. Both of us taking a moment just to bask in the feeling of one another like this again. It all felt the same but so different. He kissed the scar on my collar bone that he only got to see before when it was fresh. We had been through so much over the years we would need to learn about each other again. But one thing remained the same; my body yeard for him. He pulled out before setting a languid pace, lifting one of my legs to wrap around his waist, allowing him to go deeper, his pace quickening and lifting my hips to meet him, Chasing our pleasure. One hand in my hair, tangled up with my locks as his other hand firmly grasped my hip. The look on his face was evidence that he was holding back, needing to completely lose himself in me. And I felt the same. “Arthur...Please.” I purred, not needing to say anymore. His pace quickened with a grunt, one that was a borderline growl. My moans and the sounds of skin on skin filling the air and our ears as he kept hitting that sweet spot. My nails forming crescents on his shoulders. Pulling him down to crush my lips against his, our teeth clicking and tongues dancing together. Pulling back suddenly with swollen lips as the pressure began to build, my whole body trembling more and more as I got higher and higher. Moaning out his name as his rhythm began to falter. Nuzzling into my neck and mumbling ‘oh, fuck,’ in that gravelly but wanton voice. His hand on my hip made its way between my legs, rubbing in quick circles. I couldn’t hold back. That coil within me growing tighter and tighter before snapping. My back arching as the shockwaves rocked through me. Slowing his pace slightly to ride me through it before picking up his pace again, chasing his pleasure with a few more pumps of his hips and he stilled. His hand like a vice on my thigh as he spent himself inside me with a drawn-out moan. It took us a few moments to get our breath back. Pulling himself from me causing me to whimper from the empty feeling and sensitivity. He moved to lay beside me and pulled me to lay with my head on his shoulder. Neither of us willing to clean ourselves up just yet. My skin now acknowledging the cold air around us. The thin sheen of sweat cooling me. Nothing was said for a while as he held me close until he broke the silence to place a kiss to the top of my head then lifting my chin for my face to meet his. “I love you,” he said. My eyes getting blurry from the confession I never thought I would hear. But looking at him I knew it was true. His eyes shone with adoration. I smiled weakly before kissing him once. Looking back into his eyes and with no hesitation, I said out loud what id only heard myself mutter in my dreams. “I love you too."

[catsnraincoats-archive]

i mean im definitwly now gonna CLAIM i named myself jack to annoy you. anyway why would that annoy you

This was in pinned so you have to read from the bottom up for most of them

[ID: A series of discord messages clearly typed in a hurry. They read

" I am filled with rage at how Jack is a nickname for John. why??? Its not even shorter its just. a different name??? Did someone just forget their friends name and go "Hey Jack!" "My name is John..?" ",,,,,,,, Jack is a nickname for John dont you know" Like??? Hello???? its not even shorter!! Its not even different!! its just the same name bur slightly to the left!!!

Do you think theres been a kid named john and his whole life was spent being called Jack? Do you think he even knows his name is actually John??? how long has this gone on! Why did this become a thing!!! If Jack wasnt already a name I MIGHT be fine with it, but it IS a name!! There are people names Jack!!! There are people named John!! they're different!

"Oh this is my friend Jonathan but we just call him Jackson" "Why" "Because we're dumb shits who say you can just. Give a nickname to someone by having a different name that isnt shorter or some shit"

You can have multiple names!! you can go by multiple things!!! but you cant just say jack is a nickname for John

Okay but you see how thats similar? see how it still has max at the start?? {In reference to "max" as a nickname for "maxwell"}. If you gave your friend, Max, the nickname George?? what the fuck!! at that point they just have two names!!! EXCUSE ME? No! Why! Just say they have two names and move on! Syop DISGRACING the idea of nicknames with with foolish misuse!

Nicknames can be so many things! I call my friend Sarah "Bird" becaude xe caught a bird when xe was nine and we laugh about it! My friend Ellie goes by any plant because she likes plants! Someone I know has the nickname "Mick" because, even if he's named Daniel, theres a STORY! There has to be a reason! there has to be a connection! otherwise its just going by a different name!

I am not breathing I am living only through my anger at this point! No! If I see one person calling a John "jack" I will fight them on the spot! I dont care if they're a frail old man or if they're a seven-year-old child! "Oh this is my friend John, its short for Jack" fuck OFF! "Hi my name is Aristotle but I go by Heraclitus because its VAGUELY related and is not shorter at a l l " THATS how fucking stupid you sound! my god!

Get a fucking ruler because I dont think you know how length works! Do you need to learn to count letters again? I swear!

There are two being beside two doors, one tells lies and the other tells the truth "The earth is flat" one says, "Jack is short for John" says the other. GUESS who I'm trusting! I'll joing the flat earth society until the end of time who the FUCK do you think you are to say Jack is short for John!

NO! I'm not okay! I am fuming! I havent even met someone who actually goes by Jack instead of John but I know for a FACT they are some of the worsr people! I know damn well if I ever heard one of their voices I'd kill them on the spot if I didnt die myself

Nothing, NOTHING I say can properly explain how much I hate these people. If there isnt some ancient fucking history about this if people just went "What if we fucked up your name" I will make a time machine and kill every one of those people personally. I will squeeze the life out of every John "Jack" Lastname until they say with their dying breath that they have a shameful excuse for a name

It isnt even the people its the NAME. Its just the name. I'll stab them all with a rusty bread knife but they'll have all died of shame before I could even get close Like They Should. They arent even clowns. You know what clowns do? They make people happy! they work hard with their skills! They're good people! I'd call Jacks/Johns clowns but it'd be too much of a compliment for them.

I cant even type anymore Im not a person anymore I'm a bundle of rage fitted badly into a bag of flesh anf that is fine with me so long as I dont call myself Jack

/End ID]

[eyelessfog]

notes because. i never did add them i guess.

maybe im an ass but ember’s face being round feels. wrong? i guess? its just that its Really rounded and it feels weird when she as a character is otherwise sharp edges and also very long. like, she looks sort of stretched out otherwise so the round face feels out of place

her colour scheme, at least, is okay. my issue with it falls in her clothing, where there’s exactly two colours and its horrifically boring. come on. you have green, purple and teal to work with. use it.

more than just colours, her outfit as a whole is a little more basic than id expect. i keep falling back to “well, it’s a cartoon. they have to simplify the designs to keep it easy to animate” but then i scroll down 2 cm and that spectra lady is right there. they could take the time to give ember some patterns. anything.

johnny is fine design wise. id add some stuff if i was left to my own devices and again i don’t like the art style but that’s not what we’re talking about here. he has the weaselly look that’s both “this guy sucks and is cringe as hell” and “this guy owns and rides a motorcycle.” really, the shorthand could only be better if they gave him a banged up motorcycle helmet

kitty. her colour scheme is killing me. the issue here, for me, is that she’s all bright clashing colours. i get the green, she’s a ghost, it’s green ect ect. the red is SO bright though. id understand if it was a smaller bit that was bright red. but One of the colours needs to be toned down a little. honestly? i’d prefer it be the green.

if i were redesigning her completely, i’d show her roots, which she probably has a solid inch or two of. maybe more. green fishnet tights becomes Just Fishnets. red colour is less in your face, dulled down a bit?

take away the purple lipstick also. im so confused by it. do all the ghosts with lipstick have purple lipstick. why is it purple. i get ember - it matches the purple of her guitar. where did it come from on kitty

spectra’s HAIRRRRRRR with all due respect i actually loathe it. make fun of me whatever i didnt know she existed until a fic mentioned her and then pulled her in as an important character and did a whole bunch to make her really cool and suave and hot even. and i was like okay i have NO clue what you’re talking about. i look her up. i see that. and i have to read the rest of the fic feeling in my heart that she uses a jar of gel every day. i mean she’s a ghost so i guess not but GOODNESS.

other than that. i’d probably take out the 2 piece of her villain suit. she looks so professional that i imagine she wouldn’t really be the type to show off her stomach? her legs sure. i’m not even going to pretend i know her im just saying things. add more purple to the outfit, add more RED to the outfit. other thing i hate about her hair is that it doesn’t fit her villain outfit at ALL it only matches her businesswear.

i’d even say, take out the purple and swap it out for reds and greens. earrings, green, makeup red. i’d add a flash of a different colour, probably in her necklace? maybe gold. i don’t know. anyway

the colour schemes of these characters are probably the most annoying things to me. its too much and too heavy in certain areas. but maybe im just super picky HELP

its i should go to bed oclock at night did you guys know. ive spent probably the last 2 hours talking about danny phantom

since you asked

so. w ember i dont look at her EVER i know she has weird makeup from her eyes but hell if i rmemwber what it looks like, ive been thinking about kitty and johnny recently and all i got out of it was that kitty’s hair was weirdly rectangular. get dreads i guess. and that my pen doesn’t do dots very well. im sorry king i didnt get your acne right o777 and w whatever her name is i HAAAAATE her hair w a passion. tone it down a littlw PLEASE

THIS IS WHAT I MEAN BY REDESIGNS ARE BETTER

I LOVE that you gave Kitty dreads!!!!! Also love the body type you gave her!!! And honestly I think your Johnny looks great you did his acne pretty well imo

The like fishnet top for Ember???? I love it. And I love how you've done her hair

And Spectra!!!! Tbh I think your version of her hair is way better - it just looks more pleasing and as painful to draw as it may be, it makes her look less like an evil person (like she was pretending to be lol)

Look at me and compare your designs to these canon ones. Try to argue with me that the canon ones are better. I dare you. (You will lose. The canon designs are merely a suggestion to artists.)

[baalzebufo]

🔫😃 give us them monster au Majima deets I dare you /hj

I'm invested, I wanna know stuff, like; What was the interaction between Kiryu and Majima like after the reveal? How did Haruka find out? Was it because she lives with Kiryu or did Majima tey to keep her oblivious to it as long as he can because no.?

I WANT THE DEETS AND I WANT EM NOW

(ya don't need ta do nothin if ya don't wanna, take yer time, I just wanna show excitement with this :>)

THANK YOU for the interest I am constantly excited to talk about things and will 100% share what deets I have

(Update: this got... WAY longer than I anticipated. So im putting it behind a readmore. sorry for the wall of text I got very passionate suddenly!!)

disclaimer: I have very little solid 'canon' established and 99% of this will be stuff I make up on the spot cause thats just how I do these things

So, in my head this all takes place after the events of the first game- Kiryu's been to jail, gets out, 10 billion yen drama ect. I think it would be peak drama if Majima accidentally let slip during the fight at Shangri-la that he isn't human, he got so hyped up on the idea of a 'fight to the death' with Kiryu (which, lets be honest, was probably a bit of suicidal ideation on his part because he wanted Kiryu to utterly destroy him) that he couldn't control himself and Kiryu gets an eyeful of claws and teeth and horns. But because things are so fucking manic during that point in the game, Kiryu deadass writes it off as a weird hallucination/'this might as well be happening' because he has WAY too much going on.

it's only after the games finished and Kiryu settles down, decides hes going to adopt Haruka and is trying to get his affairs in order when he's like. Holy Shit What Was Up With That.

Majima hasn't shown his face around him since because he becomes convinced Kiryu seeing that means hes going to despise him and/or try to kill him so he crawls into his hole to mope about it and Kiryu has to genuinely jump through hoops trying to find where he is. He was concerned! Eventually he gets in touch with Nishida who is equally worried about his boss (he knows Majima's secret but is sworn not to tell anyone) so he just. quietly tells Kiryu where Majima is living right now and prays it wont come back to bite him in the ass

He goes, Majima initially attempts to be like 'haha you hit your head pretty hard down there-' and write it off like that but Kiryu is nothing if not persistent and eventually he has a little meltdown about it and finally just shows him. Majimas been in a super weird mental state since Shimano died and hes just like, at his breaking point, so he figures 'fuck it, if Kiryu hates me, whatever' at that point

OBVIOUSLY Kiryu doesnt, hes just like. dude are you okay

they have a long ass talk about it and what happened and it all sort of culminates in an awkward love confession because turns out wow you two REALLY care about each other, huh!

Majima also shares that hes only really still in the yakuza because he feels like its the only place he belongs, that a monster like him doesn't deserve anything resembling a normal life. its that conversation that starts him on the path to realizing he's not happy there tbh

Im SEVERELY rambling at this point but. after a lot of emotional catharsis between these two they promise to try to make something work. majima considers leaving the yakuza, and kiryus going to make a home with haruka. and while hes not ready to join them properly, just yet, he's... thinking about it. in the meantime, he's heard some cool stuff about construction as a business, and he's lookin' into it.

they kept it from Haruka for a while, mostly because Majima is super not comfortable showing people. He didnt spend a lot of time around her because he still felt guilty about the kidnapping thing, but eventually Kiryu pushes him to try to apologize properly and make amends. Haruka is obviously suspicious of him but, I think shes got a good judge of character when it comes to if someones being earnest, and its clear Majima wasn't acting of his own volition. (She blackmails him for lots of ice cream as an apology.)

Eventually she picks up on the fact they're hiding *something* because of how like, furtive Majima becomes when he stays with Kiryu and how he's almost never actually around, especially since he loves being the center of attention otherwise. So they brace themselves for it all to come crashing down when they tell her.

It honestly... goes fine. Maybe its just cause she's a kid and was way more willing to believe monsters exist, but it's not quite the 100% world-shaking revelation. It does set them back a bit and there's a lot of convincing that 'not all monsters are evil', but eventually she settles on. 'he's not scary. he's just kind of weird.' and you know what? majima will 100% take that.

(also she thinks its funny how he purrs when you touch his ears a certain way. he's like a big weird puppy.)

okay goddamn this post got long enough as is but. thank you again for the interest I have... so many words in my brain about this. Ideally id love to write a proper fic but im really not great at structured writing like that- it takes a helluva lot of a work compared to just infodumping into a big nightmare post like this. One Day.

I mad appreciate any and all interest though! Like, at its heart this is a hurt/comfort kinda au, and my end-goal is for Majima to realize being a monster doesn't mean he doesn't get to be happy or that he doesn't deserve to be treated like a human. it is vitally important to me that these two old sad men be happy together and build a better life lmao

[otterplusharchive]

rey! do you have any recs for kdramas? i have never watched any, but i like lovable characters and romance ? thank you in advance!

I DO IN FACT HAVE DRAMA RECS HII not all of these will be kdramas, but ill start with the kdramas ive watched and enjoyed and ill include all the warnings for them that i can remember off the top of my head and a brief synopsis for u!

kdramas-

1. weight lifting fairy kim bok joo

this was probably one of the first kdramas i saw people post about in like 2015 and i watched a little bit of it in 2016 but then only just got around to finishing it last year. the basic gist of it is its about a young sports college weight lifter, kim bok joo, centering around her navigating through her life and trying to figure out who she is and what she wants in life and what she wants to be. her romantic interest in the show is a swimmer and they have a sort of rivals to friends to lovers, he is SO in love with her and its adorable. i absolutely loved the side characters in this show theyre all so fun and kim bok joos best friends and weight lifting team are especially delightful. my main warning would be that this show addresses eating disorders and theres a lot of mention of both weight gain and weight loss, theres also a plot point early on where kim bok joo has a crush on her eventual love interests older brother but it gets resolved and the older brother literally goes "i didnt realize you had a crush on me and if i knew that i wouldnt have been so friendly with you, it would be completely innapropriate for us to be in a relationship". overall its a really sweet and emotional fun show but if you have issues with weight talk id skip this one

2. tale of the nine tailed

this one is really recent from last year and i didnt expect to be so hooked by it but boy howdy did i get attached to all the characters and the wild plot. it feels hard to explain the plot but basically a nine tailed fox named lee yeon is living in modern day seoul and is working for the underworld finding paranormal spirits/creatures/other rogue foxes that are causing havoc on the world, hes resigned himself to living this life while waiting for his girlfriend who died tragically 600 years ago to come back to life because he traded his status as a mountain god in order to ensure that her soul would one day be reincarnated. a plucky investigative journalist named nam ji ah figures out that hes not human and shenanagins ensue because she looks exactly like his dead girlfriend oooooo whatll happen. the plot beyond that gets really wild and its hard to explain and is easier to just watch. if u enjoy paranormal adventures this one is good. my one big complaint and issue with this is that the immortal mountain spirit meets his original girlfriend when shes a child and she continues to visit him off and on as she grows up which is Hm I Dont Like That! but thankfully the present time romance our female lead meets him when shes about 30 if im remembering right. also warnings for general fantasy violence, references to child abuse, animal death, and abandonment issues

3. extraordinary you

HUGE unreality warning for this. if you have issues with feeling unreal or have paranoia/delusions about not being a real person id avoid this one just because of its premise

ok i know i said tale of the nine tailed was a hard plot to explain but BOY extraordinary you is even HARDER to explain. because its so wild but so good. its about a girl who realizes that she is literally a side character in a comic book, and the story becomes her trying to change the story to save her character from dying but it becomes a lot more than that. the romance in this is literally tooth achingly sweet and the show itself is very pretty, i loved the side characters in this one and the show was engaging and interesting to watch it became really layered and meta. super reccomend this one honestly. my main issues/warnings that i can remember off the top of my head were just one character being the classic controlling boyfriend stereotype, bullying someone specifically for being poor, unreality like i mentioned before, and then at the very end there was this love interest for a side character who got reincarnated from a past piece of writing that they had been in and put in the comic but she was a student and he was the school cook which is weird but thankfully they like barely interact at all and theres no real romance he just like recognizes her and its barely a thing at the end of the show but its still weird

4. mystic pop up bar

big warning for suicide, sexual harrasment (which is framed as being bad and the guy whos harrassing the girl literally gets thrown off a roof)

i havent finished this one yet and thats mainly because im not emotionally ready because this one makes me soooo emotional. if you like found family this is a good one. its about a pop up bar run by a woman whos been tasked with solving the problems of a certain amount of people in order to atone for her crimes in the past before dying, shes able to enter the dreams of people and solve their issues using the information she gets in the dreams. paranormal shenanagins ensue, she acquires a son and a husband and it kills me its so fun and quirky and fun despite handling dark themes and peoples problems. also very sweet the found family murders me

5. kingdom (netflix original)

i literally am not going to be able to watch any other zombie media because kingdom and train to busan are the best pieces of zombie media ive ever seen. warnings for gore and violence and just general horror aspects.

i absolutely love this one its so thrilling and well done, i love the acting and the way that this show looks its absolutely gorgeous. a zombie plague breaks out in joseon period korea where the emperor has died and then was brought back to life by the queen and her father in a ploy to try and keep their family in political power, the crown prince must find answers. a lot more happens and its very dramatic and good i love the characters in this one

cdramas

1. the untamed. if you follow me and you havent watched the untamed im begging you to watch the untamed. literally one of the most beautiful stories ive experienced in my life i am not joking when i say i cried multiple times over it. the main characters are canonically gay in love and have a son together please watch the untamed. handles a lot of dark themes, heres a tw guide

2. the sleuth of the ming dynasty

this is another one i havent finished but its fun so far, very gay, found family, food, and solving murder mysteries during the ming dynasty

3. hikaru no go (also known as qi hun)

havent finished this one, there is some propaganda about hong kong in the first episode but as far as i know thats the only instance of something like that in the show

this ones about the game go and so far its very sweet and fun, local boy awakens a ghost who was a master of the game of go hundreds of years ago and eventually is persuaded to learn how to play go with the aid of the ghost. im really liking this one so far its very cute and i love the characters in it. if youve watched the untamed nie huaisangs actor ji li is in this one!

4. the legend of yunqian

this ones very short and on youtube, all the episodes are about 5 minutes long and its a lesbian time travel fantasy adventure with a happy ending! funny and cute

jdramas

1. cherry magic

please please please watch cherry magic. the premise sounds very much like a weird yaoi kind of thing but trust me on this. trust me. it is so heart warming and sweet and i was so emotional about it and the growth of the main character.

adachi gains the power to read peoples minds on his 30th birthday based off a urban legend that if youre a 30 year old virgin that youll become a wizard. after gaining this power he accidentally finds out that his extremely popular and handsome coworker has a crush on him, and shenanagins ensue along with adachi having blossoming feelings in return. this show was really refreshing in a lot of ways, adachi is a main character who like.. is unsure of himself and insecure in a very kind of realistic way, he closes himself off and is afraid to reach out to people and through the course of the show we see him slowly come out of his shell and realize that hes likeable and lovable and that people want to be around him and its so nice to see. my main complaint about this show is that i dont really like the background couple, but otherwise this is a very sweet and refreshing gay romance that has a happy ending!

some others that i myself havent seen but that ive seen people talk about a lot and that i want to watch eventually:

- the legend of fei (cdrama)

- the wolf (cdrama)

- gaurdian (cdrama, not the kdrama one called goblin)

- healer (kdrama, i did watch some of this one but it was in 2016 and i never finished it so i barely remember any of it but i do remember liking it)

- nobody knows (kdrama)

- its ok to not be ok (kdrama)

sorry this is so long but i hope youll be able to find a drama u enjoy!!

[theworld-accordingtocasey]

Future me when seein that past me did not at all heed the instructions and actually did the direct opposite:

fearing.

word count: 9,090

genre: angst, romance, gangleader!jeno

member(s): jeno, featuring donghyuck and jaemin

warning(s): small mention of blood, bruises, gunshots, kidnapping

author’s note: jeno has got me in the feels these days

⋆ part of the next destination series. please read the preface for context.

You squint your eyes, furrowing your brows at the somewhat familiar surroundings that you’re able to recognise the minute you make a right turn, exiting the creepy, dark alley. Apparently, your GPS decided that instead of using the main road, it’d rather you take weird, illegal turns through various alleys in order to get to your destination. Your car comes to a slow stop as you gradually step down on the brake. “You have arrived at your destination. Your destination will be on your right,” the GPS says. You shift your gear to park, pulling up the handbrake.

With both hands still holding on to your steering wheel, you lean your body forward, the well-lit, grand-looking building coming into full view. You watch as the doorman and bellboys scramble to serve the incoming customer. You’d be living in a cave if you’ve never heard of the five-star hotel that is owned by one of the biggest corporations in your state – Lee Family Co. As you continue to stare at the bellboy who is rushing to get the customer’s baggage onto his cart, you wonder why you’d forbid yourself from visiting this place. Honestly, you wouldn’t even be seen within a ten-mile radius of the hotel had you not written its co-ordinates in your letter.

You mentally curse at yourself – you’re too curious for your own good.

Slinging your bag across your body, you step out of your car. You have to strain your neck to be able to see the luxury hotel in its entirety, the yellow lighting only making the building appear even more golden than the gold poles that are used in its exterior design. How are you supposed to know the reason behind why you shouldn’t visit Lee Family Hotel, if you don’t even know what you’re here for?

You’re too caught up in your own thoughts that you fail to notice the presence that is looming behind you. Before you’re able to spot the shadow’s reflection in your car window, the shadow wraps an arm around your body, holding you in place. Swiftly, he brings his other hand over your nose and mouth, the cloth in the shadow’s hand that is soaked with the sweet smell of chloroform intoxicating you. You dig your nails into the flesh of the shadow, your restrained screams failing to catch the attention of potential saviours.

Your eyelids only get heavier.

You’ve blacked out.

Keep reading

[yaboyspodcastpalace]

For the character asks: Jon, Peter Lukas, Annabelle Cane? (giving multiple suggestions so you can pick one in case you get the same character twice in different asks)

very kind of you to assume i get many asks :') THANKS ill do all of them u_u

[Send me a character and i'll tell you...]

(under the cut bc i love talking and this got long lmao)

Jon

First impression

he's a uptight prick with obvious favoritism for sasha and tim and i love him so! much!!!!!!

Impression now

my poor little mew mew hm................I've got a complicated relationship w/ jon bc i love him a lot, but i loved s1 him the most, and literally everything else just makes me really, brutally, sad ;_; The way he tries so desperately to cling to his humanity and how other characters just call him by the title imposed to him makes me wanna cry

...also he just cares so much ;_; i cry

Favorite moment

probably his interactions with georgie at the beginning of season 3!!! From s5 id say when he killed not!sasha, it felt vindictive ù_ú

Idea for a story

Dhfhdh im p basic when it comes to him ngl, either jon/tim/sasha friends to lovers or jon and desolation!tim or *something*!sasha trying to stay as human as possible, together 😔 (or just any of them living and coping together in s4 n s5)

Unpopular opinion

Im just not a fan of monster jon, at all! He's not the type of character that i enjoy seeing having a corruption arc unfortunately!! It just hurts!!! (and this Is from someone that Loves corruption arcs!!!)

Also i really hate moth jon imagery??? For not particular reason, moths are pretty, but i still hate it u_u AND THE ASSOCIATION OF GREEN W/ JON (or the beholding in general!) I CANNOT STAND IT!! i know its bc of the tma logo but guess what! Its wrong! Purple jon rights!!!

ALSO ALSO the so called pining he had for martin just.... didnt felt like that at all! i have Many feelings abt this!

Favorite relationship

either georgie in s3, or sasha!!! i love how he always praises sasha in her research in s1 and even thought he's at his driest & sharp Trying-To-Project-Professionalism-And-Skepticism she still rolls into his office, interrupts him mid statement to banter w/ him abt pronunciation n stuff and its just Normal, like that speaks volumes of how comfortable they felt around each other! they were friends gdi! the moment he realizes she died and then everytime the not!them mocks him w/ her death makes me wanna break smth q_q

im not even gonna mention tim bc even though i love their relationship It 👏 makes me👏 very 👏 sad 👏

non shippy and also staying strictly canon, i love his relationship with melanie!

Favorite headcanon

sometimes i think abt that one hc that hes really good with arcade games bc he lived near the coast and i smile bc thats cute :) also hes a trans man 💙💗🤍💗💙

Peter

First impression

Mystery evil captain man!!! Fog?? I LOVE him :)

Impression now

I STILL LOVE HIM SO MUCH!!!!!!!!! Hes an asshole and has a lovely voice and smile and hes not, hes not Dumb but also he's far from the whooooa evil lonely influence he think he is (played like a cheap fiddle). He also makes me sad in ways i cannot and wont describe, and its a shame that he died cuz he was the best part of season 4 😔 rip you beautiful bastard man i still miss you </3

Favorite moment

"It has blood on it" "thats Leitner's too :D". Also when martin was angry abt idk, breekon? Jon going into the coffin? Cant remember, but peter was like I said id protect the institute, that guys not my problem ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Idea for a story

dfgdfg i have..... a petermart story that dealt with the different flavor of loneliness they both had, half smut half genuine meta of both of them and theorization on the branching of an Entity & how their powers manifested in other people...

basically, peter thinks hes hot shit when it comes to loneliness but gets overwhelmed when martin accidentally projects his feelings abt *fic's plot stuff* on him, its fun stuff!

Unpopular opinion

people either paint him like an absolute devil or an incompetent idiot and hes neither of them! hes an asshole who loves being an asshole but far from the worst monster in the show and he tried to do a clever scheme TWICE on his life and 1. while it was established that any of the rituals wouldnt work singularly the Silence was still a pretty clever attempt if it weren't for gertrude! and 2. well... he tried to manipulate someone petty and formerly supposed to be a web avatar, again not his fault, cant call him stupid for trying dfgdfg

i Do think hes kinda pathetic in some sense considering his backstory, but more out of personal pity than anything else

Favorite relationship

Canonically speaking him and martin! The pull and push of them was The best thing about season 4! Peter being a quite dangerous avatar and martin, beautiful and scared and kinda feisty, confronting him every chance he gets, peter doing his best to manipulate him and martin letting him believe hes succeeding (even thought, he is, partly). They're fascinating characters to have side by side

Favorite headcanon

Partly canonically speaking him and mikaele salesa :) they do bets together! They're lonely sea men! What else could you possibly want?

Also non shippy i like thinking abt peter's and simon's relationship but thats entirely non canon ♡

Diversity wins! The heir of the lonely is a gay man!

Also I think as every rich household(?) the lukases had many paintings and peter as a kid saw the ones w/ sailing ships and imagined sailing far far away from his family. That and seaman aesthetic fucks, which is why he always has the same vibe going on as an adult. He does Not know half of the things he'd need to know to have a ship though but hey he's rich and thats all he needs

Annabelle

First impression

thats a horrible psychological experiment they're making there D:

Impression now

THATS STILL A HORRIBLE EXPERIMENT AND ANNABELLE DESERVED SO MUCH BETTER............. idk! she makes me sad in the same way jon (and to a degree, peter) does! to be a living puppet for the thing that traumatized you as a kid and that later kinda killed you / is the only thing keeping you alive, to be devoted to it scrambling to believe in a higher reason for all of it to happen bc to believe otherwise is............. anyway. i love her, and i feel so so sorry for her

Favorite moment

her "maybe ive never been to the beach" at the end of ehr statement (that i fully believe its bullshit but, yknow, i love that she adds that), most of her convos with martin, her "i told you this might happen" "you did, you did" with mikaele

Idea for a story

i think a lot about her having conversations w/ either mikaele (platonically) or sasha (shippy) and their different points of views and treat with her making her doubt the web a bit

Unpopular opinion

listen, listen, i know it sounds like im woobifying her i Know it but reading the scraps of her story how can i Not feel sorry for her? when the story framed her very similar to jon? the supernatural childhood encounter that gave them arachnophobia and the subsequential joining with an Entity against her will? the fact that both the story and the fans treat her like a spider woman always sat very very bad to me, and the fact that the story itself always framed her like a villain (considering All The Other Characters that get the benefit of the doubt) was extremely disappointing

Favorite relationship

her and mikaele!!!!!!! wish we could have seen more scenes of just the two of them!!!!!! *singing* he is her daaaaaad, hes her dad! boogie boogie boogie! (ok no but like... their offscreen friendship is my favorite thing of season 5 ;_;)

Favorite headcanon

Sigh i dont know...i still think she's scared of spiders which make her current existence harder but thats a sadcanon :/ umm...... i love the idea of mikaele and her cooking together from time to time! Mikaele showing her some plates he used to eat as a kid as he talks stories about his life :) and she listens and sometimes tells a story of her own! its been so long since he had a quasy normal conversation! its weird yet nice!